One of the behaviors that bothers me the most is the habit to rush into telling someone how to solve his or her problem before trying to fully understanding it. If you think about it, this isn't even useful because the proposed solution will not fit the problem if the problem is not understood.
It's more valuable to me to have someone sympathize with me than to have him or her solve my problem, which may not even be solvable without time. Many problems can't be solved right away, and some depend on other people's actions to be solved.
This is not to say that I never want advice. Oh ho no! I do, I do. It's just that advice without sympathy can be a little distressing.
Luckily, I don't often experience people who act like this; most of the people I know are not like that. However, once in awhile I will run into someone whose actions are the opposite of compassion. It really disturbs and hurts me to talk to these people.
I had a recent experience where I tried to communicate how much of a difficult time I was having to an acquaintance, who was in the position to help (or at least comfort/reassure) me. There was no acknowledgment of the trouble I was in, and the advice seemed to minimize the pain and situation.
Please do not read this and think that if ever I come to you with a problem, you have to explicitly state that you are sympathetic. I know that you are already. It's just the people on the outskirts of my circle of friends/acquaintances who sometimes distress me. Has anyone else run into this?
It's more valuable to me to have someone sympathize with me than to have him or her solve my problem, which may not even be solvable without time. Many problems can't be solved right away, and some depend on other people's actions to be solved.
This is not to say that I never want advice. Oh ho no! I do, I do. It's just that advice without sympathy can be a little distressing.
Luckily, I don't often experience people who act like this; most of the people I know are not like that. However, once in awhile I will run into someone whose actions are the opposite of compassion. It really disturbs and hurts me to talk to these people.
I had a recent experience where I tried to communicate how much of a difficult time I was having to an acquaintance, who was in the position to help (or at least comfort/reassure) me. There was no acknowledgment of the trouble I was in, and the advice seemed to minimize the pain and situation.
Please do not read this and think that if ever I come to you with a problem, you have to explicitly state that you are sympathetic. I know that you are already. It's just the people on the outskirts of my circle of friends/acquaintances who sometimes distress me. Has anyone else run into this?
0 meaningful contribution(s):
Post a Comment
Hey there! Thanks for commenting.